Musings, Short stories

Night and Day

A Short Story Written A Life Ago.

I loved it when Billie Holliday sang it. I loved it when Ella Fitzgerald sang it. But it was Sinatra’s rendition that made my heart swell, with an ache that beckoned a deep nostalgia, trailed almost immediately by a flustered panic.

What was her name again?

I could never pronounce those French words and suspect I would never come close to understanding what it means to be French. He always poked fun at his own people — one of his kneejerk phrases was Sacré Francaise!, which I would later recall frequently when I think of our time together.

Yes, Marci Deschamps – a jazz chanteuse from Dijon, the city in eastern France famous for its sharp mustard. She carried herself expectedly, with the grace of what you would expect from a jazz singer. Often in a slinky, sequined black dress – classy yet sensual – carrying an understated elegance in the mist of the night. Her voice – husky – added a tinge of sadness to the otherwise spirited classic.

“When the jungle shadows fall…
So a voice within me keeps repeating you, you, you…”

“Hmm. Keeps repeating you. You. You. Night and day, you are the… Oh, hi.”

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Short stories

A Season to Die

I could not bear the agony of knowing I was still alive. Why? It was a pain greater than any I had ever known. To live without Love, to know that everything I have learned and worked for become invalid, to see through the centre of the earth and discover the many layers that weighed down on top of one another slowly corroding the surface – what then was I left with? Something within me shrieked so loud that it was almost deafening. Yet the greatest mystery was no one could hear it. Was it my soul? Was it my conscience? Whatever it was, it screamed for me; perhaps even a little for humanity. A casual observer once said to me, “Que sera sera.” Is that really possible? Que sera sera? One part of me broke into fits of laughter, almost in hysterics. I broke into tears, almost in hysterics. The wind whispered in my ear “Que sera sera.” My soul bawled in exasperation. She did not agree; neither could she understand the inertia to her misery. She became brusquely out of touch. I could not see her anymore. All I was left with was the immeasurable darkness.

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Short stories

The Outsiders

From the balcony of her window, she could see the sad, thinking man, like her, sitting near his window, looking out into the space and cool of the night, wondering if there were more to this same-same routine he had come to call his “life”. He was not unhappy; he was by all measures what most would call a happy man, who has everything one would hope for in a suburban neighbourhood. A self-made man, he achieved career and success early in his life, with family comfort dropped on his lap a decade ago when it was deemed necessary for a man of his age and status to have a fitting wife and a tidy pack of children. He was well-liked by his colleagues as he gave a measured amount of care and concern about each of their lives, and he was held in high regard by his superiors for being neatly efficient. Alas, it seems to the outside world that the only thing he lacked was a Lassie-type hound to complete the middle class dream of white picket fences and unmessy, uncomplicated contentment.

The woman, who had been watching this man for several nights now, sensed the deep currents of unhappiness in this neat package of an executive. She had seen his eyes furrow when they wandered into a destination somewhere far away from where he now was and although she was too far to see, she imagined that she caught glimpses of tears as whatever he was thinking of was too impossible to attain. Every day at midnight, he would pour himself a glass of Scotch on the rocks, drink a sip of it, lay a coaster neatly for fear of spoiling the wood of his side table, then lay the glass calmly on the coaster, before raising the glass again to drink more of it. Was it just to numb his senses to the daily act he had to perform? Or, was it to intoxicate himself so that he could arrive at that place where he so yearned to be? The woman, who escapes to her window to catch a breath in the starlight, amused herself by thinking that this man knew the secret destination of where they both wanted to be.

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Sex, Short stories

My Little Door

What she saw through the closet caused a riot inside her. The peep show between the panels of the doors seemed to be a scene that had played in her mind, in her sleep and in her drowsy consciousness countless of times. “Is this real?” she wondered. Is she dreaming this up? Is it one of the heady fantasies she had while pretending to be unaffected?

From where she was hiding, she saw the soft light landing on the smooth girly and almost transient curves of what seemed then the most perfect creature her eyes ever saw. The target of her desire was removing her clothes one by one, slowly revealing supple breasts that tilted upwards like firm tomatoes that had just come into season. The silk dress she had on seemed to cascade off her body.

Frantic and busy thoughts were running through her mind. But more importantly, there seems to be a current of hard tension rushing through her body that excited her and scared her at the same time. She tried to stay calm, and still, in order to keep a good grasp on her camera as she recorded what she saw through the panels.

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Musings, Short stories

Whispers of A Starry Night

High up above the sky, stars, spread across the expanse of the galaxy, sit down and enjoy a conversation of whispers among themselves. Tonight, they are whispering about a girl, fixed to a window in the southeastern hemisphere of Earth, who has summoned their attention with the deep sorrow flushed down the hollow tunnel of her body and salty tears that stain her gaunt cheeks. The stars meet her wide-eyed gaze as her far-away eyes shoot a thousand questions, requests and sighs at the sparkling dots in the midnight blue. Tell me the antidote for life, her mind’s eye asked, tell me the antidote for emptiness. Tell me the antidote for pain, and sorrow. Tell me the antidote for joy and happiness. Tell me, tell me, tell me how to get through the engulfing loneliness of the night. Tell me, stars, I beg of you.

And the stars, split into two houses, performed a concert for the girl with the inquisitive eyes. One house whispered “tell me, tell me, tell me” and the other threw spurts of whispers, saying, “No answers at all. No answers. The pain, the sorrow, the emptiness, the joy, the happiness, the day, the night, the night, the day, all of life, makes up all of life. Tears, laughter, calm, storm, all of life, makes up all of life. Pain, comes from love. Love, comes from pain.” The girl, marvelled at the spectacular concert for her benefit, heaves a sigh of contentment, and nourished by the whispers of the stars, she prepares to face another day. And at sun down, she will look at the sky again, for the whispering comfort of her all-knowing friends.

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