It may be that queasy feeling in your mouth, or that heavy, bruised sensation around your chest. We all instinctively know when something makes us uncomfortable — when something makes us stop for a second to think about the situation we are in.

When you have the flu, you stay in bed, you get a flu shot, you take flu meds. You try to solve the problem. However, when it comes to something more abstract, like our feelings, needs or desires, we often take a backseat, stick with unscientific diagnoses and seek solace in self-fulfilling prophecies that reinforce “comfortably uncomfortable” familiar routines.

Routines and habits that, if broken, mean the world as we know it will change, and for some people, it’s easier to walk into a war zone littered with blown up babies and ghastly body parts, than to sit down and have an honest conversation with their estranged family members.